7 lessons from 2 years in isolation

What two years in lockdown has taught me

Life lessons from lockdown. Here are 7 lessons from two years indoors, expanded on below:

  1. take ownership of risk
  2. acknowledge your luck
  3. go with the flow
  4. acknowledge your relationships
  5. listen and learn
  6. set your boundaries
  7. start and end with respect

Two years ago, today

13th March 2020 was a Friday. The fear, and denial of a distant threat, had turned to a reality. SARS-Covid-19 had definitively arrived in London. I had already sought permission from my university course to either defer or be given means to complete my course remotely. This Friday 13th marked my last face to face meeting. A pass/fail assessed MSc presentation on Engineering Safety Management – a group exercise which I had unwittingly become the coordination point to conclude. My daily train trips to Farringdon had become notably more hazardous – to the point that walking the last mile or so from Blackfriars had already become normal. A walk that meant I could visit three pharmacies en-route and buy precious paracetamol, a daily need which was already in short-supply.

Living from home

Within days the whole country was locking doors. We speak of it now as “Working from home” but that is perhaps not quite equating to the same thing. The service industry was about to be starved of patrons, as life outside stopped. For the likes of me, indoors was now life. Work, rest, and play; becoming extended study, anti-socialising, and staycations.

Two years in, and perhaps a little more to go, I have a few observations to share. The remainder of this blog I therefore offer as lessons from living a lockdown life at home.

Lesson 1 : take ownership of risk

Life was already changing, but it was becoming increasingly clear that there was no contingency plan in high places. Hospitals were reporting high death-rates. Medical advice was contradictory. There was no clear guidance for those clinically vulnerable. If I were to come home with the virus, my wife (and the 21% of her lung capacity still working) would be quickly overwhelmed. We were not the average risk case. We could not live at the level of uncertainty now present. We needed to determine risk from our own perspective.

It was also obvious that even the average risk was late to be realised in high places. We had no confidence that we had institutions around us – government in particular – adapting or even reacting in a manner that was going to keep my wife safe. So the decision was made; we were staying home.

Luckily for us, we had been living with contingency plans set for some time.

Lesson 2 : 🍀 acknowledge your luck 🍀

Two years is a long-time to be away from the world. We are however more fortunate than many who have been in similar situation. We had less domestic or work related constraints to manage. Most people in the support groups for Pulmonary Fibrosis had a tougher time adjusting. Sadly, not all did. Economic or medical care demands exposed many to risk they could not manage. Others just boldly or foolhardily carried on – loud in their protest or denial but all suddenly stopping; followed by news of another death in the group.

We were lucky. Adversity had already found us. So too therefore had contingent planning already long been put into action. Life had dealt a crappy hand to a fine teacher and had forced her to give up work several years before. I had already made a career choice that enabled me to work from home. The home office was already built. The mortgage paid. Financial priorities reviewed, repurposed, dumbed down. Wanting less, needing less, earning less.

But I had also buried my own thoughts deeply, and they had already broken free. I was back at university revisiting life goals and needs. Dealing with mental illness, diagnosed the year before. Part of a reset already underway. For a multitude of reasons, we were already primed for dealing with change.

Lesson 3 : go with the flow

Going with flow is not quite as compromise-orientated as it first sounds. For any independent person, there is a stability problem if one just meanders and adapts to any and all demands put upon your time. My wife and I have a strong domestic platform: in our relationship; in our physical security, safety, and basic needs; and now also in our clarity of priorities. It is only by that stable base that I think we have been able to maintain a perspective of hope as daily challenges come and go. We can go with the flow. But only because we can also let some things flow by, or wash over us. Going with the flow has meant letting some options and aspirations go.

Lesson 4 : acknowledge your relationships

Love your network. Be part of the network you wish to know. With 21st Century technology to hand, networking is fundamentally how we each grow.

As a household this presents a moment to acknowledge many people:

  • Friends, family, and the kindness of strangers who have been at the other end of a phone. Places to chat, the occasional quiz or game of cards.
  • At the height of the pandemic local people making themselves available to fetch and carry medicines and sundries.
  • Long-standing relationships with supermarket chains, car dealerships, banks and credit card companies. All were vital sources of assistance and being looked upon favourably in our moments of need.
  • Prioritised, reliable, and understanding gas-heating engineers, white goods repairers, gardeners and tree surgeons.
  • A fleet of delivery services who have kept us going. A postal service that has regularly supplied me with books.
  • My business associates and client friends, university staff and fellow students, all making allowances for my situation.
  • Neighbours who have overlooked rickety fences, raggedy hedges, and occasional unkempt lawns.
  • The many medical staff at various hospitals who have enabled distance orientated treatment possible. A pharmacy who have delivered medicines to our door. Oxygen suppliers and breathing apparatus repairs as and when called. Plus my therapist, and GP both of whom have kept tabs on me too.
  • Long standing mentors and mentees, plus a few new relationships I’d categorise here. Old business contacts reaching out, offering support, or just revisiting online as a social outlet and checking we were okay.
  • The hundreds, many hundreds, of new connections, contacts, and sources of inspiration on platforms such as LinkedIn. A true lifeline connection to the outer world. A place of discourse, learning, and chat which eventually encouraged me to begin this blogsite. New connectivity in new places leading to new opportunities, invitations to join think-tanks, guest slots on podcasts, working groups, organisations and societies. Plus many moments to talk over zoom with amazing new people at leisure and at length.

So many kindnesses, from so many places.

This lesson in management is also a moment to appropriately acknowledge relationships at home. In many respects we are self-contained. Our relationship to each other is one of love and respect. We have built a home in that image. We habitually lunch at the table. Moments to regather from different corners of the home. We enjoy each other’s company, and our moments alone.

We rescued a cat a few months before I started university. Or maybe he helped rescue us. Like us, he is happy looking into rather than being in a garden that looks after itself, offering up wildlife at our windows. Each of those interacting relationships have helped pull us through.

Lesson 5 : listen and learn

Two years into a lockdown, and maybe just a few months to go. It’s been an enforced time of reflection and new learning. Communication in new ways. Cooperation in discourse, and collaboration in effort.

Listening and learning from the experiences of others and ourselves. Listening and learning from what is happening within ourselves, within our relationship, and within the home. Communication, or just checking-in.

For me that has also been part of deeper journey. Serendipity played a hand here, that I began to find ways to do this before this lockdown ensued. For me this is now meditation, contemplation, journaling, and occasional therapy. It is also this blog. Critically, it was also giving myself permission to reignite and feed a curiosity, a more open mind to see more, and hear more. Hearing the wisdom of others in many forms.

Lesson 6 : set your boundaries

Everyone will have different perspectives on working from home. How do we create the appropriate separation, if any? Not expecting people to be 24/7 at our beckoning or call.

My attitude is one of adaptability. To accept that there are times that other people’s need for work/life balance are going to impact my own. But I have also been prepared to retain boundaries that mean others respect my time too.

Thankful to my neighbour for tolerating blurred boundaries

I personally place a necessary lesser expectation upon others. Colleague, client, or collaborative partners. But I’m curious to know how this changes expectations of behaviour in ourselves. I work in different time zones, to deadlines or towards developmental ideas of my own, as well as remotely from people I interact with.

Lesson 7 : start and end with respect


There are no binary rules here. Home and work can co-exist. Being present and being honest with what that means becomes critical if it is to work long-term. This is simply relationship building and management by both sides, built around mutual respect. Both sides, therefore also meaning you.

My heartfelt thanks – so many have pulled us through!

150 years old

Living longer – to do what?

Dr. David Sinclair is at the leading edge of understanding, and possibly not only slowing but reversing the ageing process. I leave several links to podcasts and science papers at the end of this blog. Maybe you watched my recent 3 minutes response to a question of future-skilling for project in 2030 {LinkedIn or here}. With Sinclair’s 2017 book Lifespan in hand, my own perspective was to challenge the relatively recent phenomena of retirement as a social norm. Whether a longer life, even as a possibility, should be the societal prompt to rethink the second half of life. To which the question of a contemporary up skill seems suddenly almost a necessity if a 40 year career suddenly becomes 60 years or more.

This is neither a science-fiction dystopia or utopia. This is science today. The science literature is deep, and widespread across top tier academia. Dr. Sinclair and his lab for example are at Harvard Medical School. He is pretty adamant that humans are already walking among us who will live to 150. Controversial, but mainstream in discourse. Some of the everyday practices that are promoted are as simple as fasting, low to no meat diets, exercise, and supplements that are already available on the high street. We are also promised something more is in the ether. For now however, simply living a lifestyle that the longest living communities on earth have followed for generations – with some 21st Century science – is all that is deemed necessary for now.

My lingering questions are already shifting toward societal implications. Imagining the impact of a whole workforce gifted time to retrain, re-educate, reset, rather than retire. Seeking to be self motivated in endeavour into a much deeper term in life. The value we could all add with more time. But is that really what we will be doing with such a gift? Or such a curse?

One thing it will do is recalibrate social consciousness. Maybe I’m too idealistic in my hope that this will be for the better. But few pensions could hope to last long – and trust funds may not get passed on quite so quick. What would therefore emerge? An even greater desire to accumulate more materials, consume more, do less on harder working cash. Or does a sense of purpose become more central to a longer time at the wheel?

Most projects have a forced time line. Derived from hidden agenda of something or someone we never get to see. Does time become more valued – as a tool not a constraint – if we have more of it available? Do asset management decisions become more long-term? Is asset life-cycle and whole asset life thinking finally to see the light of day? Now that we are potentially not only still alive but also still involved when it comes to the long-term impacts of short-term decisions? Imagine having to explain your decisions from 50 years ago and still be threatened with societal scorn for 50 years more. What would our politics look like if we were to start demanding accountability of the long-term goals? Demanded because we were still likely to be around to pay the toll. Do we cry foul more reverently when its our future at stake? What happens when our parents and our children are all grown up and actively working – 3 generations looking the same age? The saga holiday replaced by the 18 to 80 holiday. Do the wider imbalances in society and globally become more exaggerated or diluted as lifetimes of grudges never fade, or altruistic sentiments are given longer to take centre stage. Does the planet now have a say? Or does our political map end our play?

There is a psychology theory that states our decision options are directly related to our sense of mortality. It’s an interesting experiment you can all play at home. Introduce the idea of death into a conversation. The “Terror” of death psychologically directing a more colloquial point of view. In this context, is a more distant death a gateway to a more rational account of what we really cannot live without.

I’ve no interest in living that long. But I’m happy enough to plan to be working on. And well into the days that others have to assume it is them – not their children’s children – that must work these 21st Century realities out.

Below: David Sinclair website and podcast. Plus one paper that offers some of the science, dated 2014.

https://www.lifespanpodcast.com/nmn-nr-resveratrol-metformin-and-other-molecules-for-longevity/

The Intersection Between Aging and Cardiovascular Disease. North, Brian J ; Sinclair, David A PHILADELPHIA: American Heart Association, Inc Circulation research, 2012-04-13, Vol.110 (8), p.1097-1108

Secrets at work (happiness)

Tracy Brower PhD – a blogger of note

In this note, I present a body of blog materials that I have enjoyed reading immensely. I have summarised many of the blogs, and used my categorisations of v | b | t to create a reference note I can revisit and reuse. This note is wholly adapted from this blog series. I would recommend everyone visit the complete series at some length and at leisure. Links to both original author and all articles are embedded herein.

Tracy Brower is a PhD sociologist writing regular blogs on workplace related issues, and the relationship between employer, employee, and the effectiveness and well-being of both. Happiness is never far from subject matter, and I have had a happy 48 hours reviewing these blogs. The back catalogue of blogs is a treasure trove of clear concepts and ideas | great sharing of research and contemporary theory around behavioural science | and backed by trusted sources of research and enquiry.

Tracy Brower‘s Forbes blog begins in December 2018. I wanted to capture as much insight as I could from these blogs, and my Sunday became Monday and was in danger of becoming Tuesday, as I reviewed each blog and realised how much could better inform my research. My summarising was best served in the WordPress templates, so this has evolved into this blog.

From a research perspective this note is an example of how I summarise the more influential articles, journals, or books I read. It is rare to find so much goodness in one place. I anticipate any future generalising and theming or subcategorising I do here – specific to v | b | t – or its eventual betterment – will include a revisiting of these notes. It will also prompt further reading of wider cross-references made.

Presented in reverse chronology. Each article is presented as following the same subcategorising:

{title, date, link}; {context}; Visibility as…- Behaviour as….- Trust as…

Knowledge Is Power, But Not In The Way You Think, Dec 2018.  Information Density as v | b | tVisibility as “radical transparency” as the number of people who can actively engage with information – Behaviour as the number of people in real time able to base decisions upon it – Trust as the openness of Leadership to share, in near real time, with attention to ease of understanding, acuity, engagement, and transient ease of flow.

Don’t be a hero: a new take on teamwork, January 2019. Teamwork not heroes as v | b | t Visibility of the whole endeavour by all involved and a shared success witnessed beyond the team – Behaviour as the means to ensure realised value and role importance to all – Trust in each other and of the team built upon prior achievements “even with team members who haven’t worked together before”.

Want More Innovative Solutions? Start With Empathy, January 2019. Creativity nurturing as v | b | t – Visibility of creativity in a way that results in innovations people will adopt – Behaviour reflecting upon the 2/3rds of people admitting to not living up to their creative potential; idea exchange being nurtured by frameworks and workspaces focused upon user experience and need – Trust as necessarily creating psychological safe space for community belonging, and thinking, to thrive.

Give To Get: Sensing, Tracking And Your Privacy, February 2019. Appropriate privacy as v | b | tVisibility as the greater acuity offered by tech vs the hidden aggregations and uses of data behind the tech – Behaviour as the give to get equation or having mode relationship between the user and their tech – Trust as the same give to get decision of having mode upside vs the potential for implied trust that may be abused

Attract And Retain Talent In One Of The Tightest-Ever Labor Markets: Here’s How March 2019. Moral rules split between v | b | tVisibility as witnessed fairness and equitable treatment of effort – Behaviour as creating the team environments, collaborations over corporate boundaries, enforcement of respectful cooperation, and an environment of mutual help – Trust as the strong relationships that then exist between parties, the safe space to take risks within capable range, the deference to experience not leadership when circumstance demands.

How Not To Get Stuck With All Your Team’s Work: When Less Is More, March 2019. Characteristics indicating a team is too big as v | b | t. Visibility as over-saturation, clarity of role and accountability, plus affirmed phenomena via overwhelmingly voluminous academic studies showing that innovation comes from smaller teams – Behaviour as too big a team enabling less ownership and presenting places to hide, remedied by less but more effective communication extended to outside the immediate team, skill adaptability to step in or diversify, enabling a team to evolve – Trust in each other as a shared and all inclusive evolving team ability, backed by training and wider support.

Four Ways Working With Others Can Help Bring Out Your Best, April 2019, Tapping into social instincts as v | b | t. Visibility as social facilitation as better performance from having to play to a crowd, and self-awareness by being witness to yourself – Behaviour as seeking to associate with colleagues who inspire you and get you to perform your best “go fast, go alone – go far, go together” – Trust as increased awareness of your reputation and acting toward accountability and contribution to the whole

Agile: Why Your Efforts Will Fail (And How To Make Them Succeed Instead), May 2019. Potential failing using Agile as v | b | t. Visibility as superficial understanding, and lack of attention to the collective effort required – Behaviour as failing to holistically apply Agile e.g., not committing to it fully; not orientated the whole organisation and internal parts to it; not training sufficiently to support the accountabilities involved – Trust as being misplaced if using Agile as a quick fix; expecting results too soon without supporting transitional need; thinking only in terms of sprints and not the marathon journey of change.

Why Your Intern Shouldn’t Make The Coffee: How To Create Meaningful Work, June 2019. Positive experiences with interns as v | b | t. Visibility as new perspective, contemporary knowledge, singular attention to a task; and offering a big picture view of the company they are interned to – Behaviour as being controlled via the boundaries set; empowered and task set that are able to be owned, shaped, influenced by them; challenging enough to be an accomplishment; necessarily relevant to require internal engagement with others – Trust as the clarity of the boundaries they are set, and the defined autonomy they therefore feel comfortable in.

New Requirements For Agile Leadership: How To Lead Differently For Agile Success, July 2019. Agile leadership as v | b | t. Visibility as valuing transparency of work, goals, and information; as measuring performance – Behaviour as being present but in a guidance not doing mode; retaining contact to clients; safely encourage risk taking; feedback, intervention, and celebration – Trust as an advocate for the team; ongoing interest in developing through increasing responsibility and accomplishment of each team member; and relevant challenge to the individuals whilst still accounting for the team.

Want Better Mental Health And Success At Work? Get A Goal, July 2019. Pursuing goals as v | b | t. Visibility as goal clarity via the focus on your why – Behaviour as incremental actions towards goals leading to increasing optimism – Trust as increased confidence that you are on the right path, and giving more grit and determination to maintain effort (even if progress is unexpectedly slow).

Want To Find Your Purpose At Work? Change Your Perceptions, August 2019. Changes to perception as v | b | t. Visibility as connecting to the bigger picture – Behaviour as reworking priorities and method of tasks; self-empowerment by being purposeful toward something bigger not simply having a role; finding the value and worth of the task, via its impact upon others; awareness of uniqueness you bring; being mindful of your value in all your capacities and contributions – Trust as a self respect and ownership of your dignity no matter the task at hand.

How To Thrive In A Job You Don’t Love: 7 Strategies, September 2019. Job satisfaction as v | b | t. Visibility as setting vision toward your next role – Behaviour as positive attitude and active patience; seek learning from adversity even if that is just a test of resolve; seek learning from the wider situation and setting of the company; channel extra energy toward a positive future goal – Trust as nurtured through support structures (i.e., friendships); as confidence in your ability to retain self-control.

Is Agile Really Worth It? Evidence Says Yes, If You Do These 4 Things. October 2019. Reasons for using Agile as v | b | t. Visibility as transparency of workload – Behaviour as people orientated; customer feedback driven; one sprint at a time, one project at a time; continuous learning – Trust as built within team continuity; familiarity of process by company-wide use.

How To Thrive At Work: 10 Strategies Based On Brain Science, November 2019. Brain science insights as v | b | t. Visibility as utilising natural light, to support melatonin suppressions post sleep – Behaviour as habits caused by screen time toward skimming or scanning text (because of internet usage) rewiring the brain (cf The Shallows, by Nicholas Carr); needing to actively seek distraction free places to relearn concentration and more considered empathy (cf Deep Work by Cal Newport); return to taking breaks, exercise and social interactions; find green spaces, light, ceiling height, views, and privacy – Trust as returning to more natural habits and less reliance upon artificial and technology solutions to problems technology creates.

Research Says People Can’t Change: How To Avoid Hiring Difficult People Through Successful Selection, November 2019. Recruitment efficacy as v | b | t. Visibility as a warning not to rely too heavily on our own perceptions; as a means to seek detailed responses, indicators, patterns, or demeanour; offering more information if settings can be varied to see socialised clues – Behaviour as habitually hard to change in some people; an inborn morally suspect pattern for some; – Trust as a lean towards the person, their enthusiasm, their future facing interest, and general fit toward a team; do not judge by qualifications.

Want To Be A Great Leader? How Cooperation, Sharing And Belonging Predict Success, November 2019. Cooperation in leadership as v | b | t. Visibility as being witnessed as a cooperative force; sharing information; sharing the authentic self; sharing the goal and long-term vision – Behaviour as cooperative default; sharing goals and spotlight; helping, belonging; – Trust as engendering a cooperative ethos with example being mimicked by the team; building understanding by being authentic

Getting What You Want At Work: 7 Strategies, December 2019. Ensuring personal needs are part of the plan as v | b | t. Visibility as clarity on what you want; clarity of priority of needs shared with the boss; awareness of alternative options – Behaviour as claiming back ownership for making your needs known; finding appropriate communication style; performing, seeking feedback and a mentor, patient but persistent – Trust as owned by you, demonstrated in your endeavours, and if necessary the resolve to exercise your own change.

Confidence Without Arrogance: Why You Should Stop Trying To Be The Smartest Person In The Room—6 Tips To Avoid The Arrogance Trap, January 2020. Confident not arrogant as v | b | t. Visibility as acuity toward signs of ill advised interference vs valued challenge – Behaviour as being not having; being present, receptive and actively seeking other ideas and understanding of other opinion and perspective; cooperative; challenging for sake of successful outcome not personal gratification; deference; respect; reciprocity; and equity – Trust as derived from ensuring psychological safety to be valued, respected and treated fairly.

Successful Change Management: 6 Surprising Reasons People Resist Change And How To Motivate Them To Embrace It Instead, February 2020. Managing Change as v | b | t. Visibility as clear future direction; clarity on impact to others; – Behaviour as addressing lost autonomy, saving face, security, competence and connections – Trust as understanding root-cause of resistance, openness to explain motivations; clarity of message and positive outcomes; enabling people to retain their dignity in the face of bad news.

When Fear Drives Us Apart: 6 Ways To Collaborate Rather Than Compete And Why It’s Important For Your Career, March 2020. Collaboration as v | b | t. Visibility as clear goals; feedback as a group not ranking against others; – Behaviour as actively avoiding making heroes; fostering team relationships; compete but beyond the team boundary; celebrate as a team; – Trust as building a collaboration (working together as a team), not just cooperative individuals (working with colleagues).

Communication Is More Important Now Than Ever Before: 9 Ways To Reassure And Re-Engage Your Team, March 2020. Leading in a crisis with reassuring communication as v | b | t. Visibility as clarity and factual focus; presenting the big picture – Behaviour as aiming to be relevant (succinct to the present need) and redundant (offering a message often enough to be certain it is understood); present means to be understanding, sensitive, and empathetic; pragmatic; seek to unify (always we) as a shared journey – Trust as the inspirational, engaged, and plan focused, voice of calm.

How To Thrive During The Pandemic: 10 Strategies For Resilience Based On Brain Science, April 2020. Resilience to adversity as v | b | t. Visibility as self-awareness to needs for connection, socialising, and perspectives that offer a positive long-term outcome – Behaviour as increased awareness and need for normalising habits (breaks, movement, natural light); acting with altruism and generosity for positive reactions in the brain – Trust as increased self-awareness and vigilance to your needs.

How To Sustain And Strengthen Company Culture Through The Coronavirus Pandemic, May 2020. Culture management as v | b | t. Visibility as leaders seen to be the single source of truth; articulating and validating culture; new challenges of managing behaviours at a distance you cannot see; visibly recognise actions of merit and hold accountable those that fail; open and transparent communication is culturally significant – Behaviour as defining culture; as managing behaviour shapes the culture, therefore values and norms come from reinforcing good, or tolerating bad; nurturing and investing in skills and training in ways that enable community, despite the distance; acknowledge natural leadership emerging and reinforce mentoring to foster new talents – Trust as the result of ensuring understanding by all, and minimising uncertainty or confusion; upholding values despite adversity.

HR’s Compelling New Role In Response To The Coronavirus, June 2020. Human Resources elevated role in times of adversity as v | b | t. Visibility as future of work vantage point and systemic viewpoint; source of people analytics, central repository of employee contracts and entitlements – Behaviour as impacting culture, guidance towards action decisions, and leadership support; talent strategy and implementations; engagement and inclusion; well-being assistance; governance and process support – Trust as supporting communication, policy development, empathy to needs and means to retain consistent responses to disciplinary process or intervention

Onboarding During The Pandemic: How To Give New Employees A Running Start, July 2020. Onboarding in a crisis as v | b | t. Visibility as access to people, information, tools and technology- Behaviour as enablers of social capital development and connectivity with colleagues, leaders, and mentors; be explicit with instructions and how critical controls apply, roles and responsibilities, swim lanes; ensure wider team awareness and need to include; training focus and regular enquiry; seeking new ways to ensure they can contribute; – Trust as presence, shared interest by wider team, explicit understandings, relationship building, and the immediate sense of team.

How To Manage The Work When You Can’t See People Working: 5 New Takes On Accountability, August 2020. Remote accountability as v | b | t. Visibility as recognition for reaching expectations or not; a means to reduce blind-spots via open sharing and wider impact awareness (cf. Johari Window) – Behaviour as a metric of feedback orientated towards success; – Trust as accountability serving fairness

When Bad News Is A Good Thing: 7 Reasons To Embrace Transparency, August 2020. Encourage Bad News as v | b | t. Visibility as demonstrating respect, and creating higher information density – Behaviour as empowering people to make informed choices or decisions; increasing productivity by reducing time needed to seek information or lose time or opportunity to act; greater adaptability and action orientated intervention- Trust as derived from enabling better understanding and psychological safety; enhanced commitment where both success and hard moments are shared.

How To Close The Distance On Remote Work: The Most Important Leadership Skill, August 2020. Being present at a distance as v | b | t. Visibility as a correlate to engagement with the team – Behaviour as responsiveness and accessibility in both mindset and means; acuity of capability and needs; finding means to engage with less set time via one-2-ones, calendar sharing, punctuality, set windows, immediate action focus, follow up emails to confirm – Trust as empowerment and increased responsibility within carefully set parameters and control

Everyday Kindness: How Small Acts Have Big Impact, September 2020. Kindness as v | b | t. Visibility as the witnessing of kindness being infectious; seeking perspectives of others; looking for and socialising examples of kindness – Behaviour as being present by tuning in and enabling spontaneity in gifting help; closing proximity by communicating and enquiring not just distantly observing and assuming; incremental steps of action, not significant steps as promises; be humble and vulnerable giving and accepting help without condition or expectation of return (cf. Rebecca Solnit “A paradise built in hell”); action orientated can mean not being afraid to lead or initiate action; build environments where the helpful is not just allowed by embraced – Trust as the collective sense of protection that results from a genuine shared concern for the collective wellbeing.

Working Remote: How To Build Trust From A Distance, September 2020. Modelling of the other from distance as v | b | t. Visibility as being open and transparent – Behaviour as means to build trust via open sharing, assume goodwill, remain present and available, be predictable and easy to read, be supportive, be selective, and hold people to account, acting with integrity – Trust as an instinctive tendency to believe, and a reciprocal tendency

Career Resilience: How Small Steps Can Lead To The Greatest Success, September 2020. Prospects management as v | b | t. Visibility as looking for ways to take initiative; be open and therefore visible in discipline to tasks; seek to grow network so this visibility is increased – Behaviour as being mode by focusing on current performance and avoiding too much time in owning past success; be present by aiming to be consistent, dependable, reliable; aiming for incremental betterment but emergent from, not instead of, current responsibilities; take initiative; manage your moments not other peoples expectations – Trust as the resultant authentic you, both the trust in yourself and the trust that others will come to portray in you.

Exhausted By Networking: 7 Ways To Keep Going In Your Job Search, September 2020. Consistent networking as v | b | t. Visibility as the reward to putting yourself out there; as the changing perspective it is affording you; and clarifying your aims and seeing clearer intent or goals – Behaviour as the changing mindset networking is instilling; adopting Robert Frost’s “the best way is always through” which is action orientated and therefore being mode; becoming not owning by being future focused not just having a past; learning new ways to be effective and achieving more impact by strategic engagement not just volume; self-management by time, planning, and giving account of realistic aims; owning your own psychological safety by the vigilance and relevance of meetings and avoiding too much acting or show; self-improvement by constantly reaching towards the edge of ability and the resulting incremental growth – Trust as the authenticity that comes from belonging and engaging in meaningful and wholesome ways

Study Shows People Prefer Robot Over Their Boss: 6 Ways To Be A Leader People Prefer, October 2020. Better leadership as v | b | t. Visibility as being seen as a supportive and unbiased lens; transparency in your own motives and wider overall goals; – Behaviour as being objective and less quick to pass judgment; efficient with follow-up action and prioritising, work-load management of self and others; actively identify, manage, and defend boundaries of work-life balance, people, process, roles, technology and systems; being the means to connect better solutions rather than trying to always be the problem solver – Trust as impartiality and bringing less personal bias and self-interest into discussion, behaviour, and thought

Bad Bosses: When Good Intentions Go Wrong And 5 Ways To Lead Well, October 2020. Better leadership as v | b | t. Visibility as observing the bad boss to better understand boundaries of good practices gone bad – Behaviour as selective and genuine encouragement; as giving controlled enthusiasm as consistently needed not as less unpredictably felt; gifting personal empowerments, flare and creativity, but with attention to boundaries and control; generous in other person, or team, recognitions – Trust as reflected in the present and accomplished leader, able to apply leadership learning, not simply demonstrate its good intent.

Virtual Communication: The One Thing You Can Do To Be More Effective, October 2020. Communicating at distance as v | b | t. Visibility as acknowledging less regular interactions means less visibility of what is really going on and therefore seeking out more information; – Behaviour as acknowledging new situations takes longer for everyone so create the time for communication; new needs more communication so encourage more of it and do more of it; curbing the attribution error of other owned blame, particularly the tendency to jump to conclusions when non-verbal clues are no longer available e.g., no camera may mean a rambunctious puppy in the background not a lazy start to their day; create environments fitting to the communications available e.g., more space complimented by set times for discussions that, in an office, would just happen naturally; be intentionally more empathetic to make up for the lesser time available to pick up on non-verbal clues; be more forgiving; find new ways to build relationships – Trust as a potentially stronger bond when forged in moments of shared hardship or endeavour.

How To Build Community And Why It Matters So Much, October 2020. Community building as v | b | t. Visibility as clarity and reminder of the shared purpose; the shared vision of the collaborative cathedral builders not the cooperating brick layers; shared business literacy and therefore broader context – Behaviour as playing to natural strengths and human social needs; encourage proactivity and impactful experience; actively maintaining a dialogue and contact, including regular one-2-ones, and seek dense interactions (cf. the economic journal); encourage others to build and bring their social capital with them; decision-making with empathy is best (cf. Journal of Neuroscience); seeking new learning and ability stretch both of yourself and encouraging others to do the same, if no-one is making mistakes then either a team is under-reaching or under-reporting; build the career space for others but also hold them accountable for their performance and how they contribute to that of others; – Trust as the shared purpose and contribution; kinship and psychological safety; and shared journey of evolution; not the personal gain towards revolution.

Is Your Workplace Toxic Or “Just” High Pressure? 10 Ways To Know, November 2020. Busy vs toxic as v | b | t. Visibility as clarity of a bigger picture and how you fit in or being in the dark on priorities or the bigger why; everyone can reveal their imperfections and ask for help vs everyone pretends to be perfect , hides deficiency, i.e., the fake it to make it is wall to wall – Behaviour as appreciative or forever demanding more; working in an arena of openness, sharing or secrecy, hidden agenda, and subterfuge; freedom to speak and be heard or required to silently comply; feedback is open and constructive or managed through back-channels or aimed at you and not with you at all; task delegations are on need and edges of capability, vs loaded to the willing with others allowed to do nothing at all; is there respectful humour or angst and tears in the air; is a heavy workload relieved with a break or it deemed to never end – Trust as fair and all together toward one goal or divisive, elitist, and hidden motive; is there enough balance and support to allow short periods of exhaustively busy or is it relentless and as if you’re on your own.

How To Focus On Your Work When There’s So Much Going On, November 2020. as v | b | t. Visibility as clarity of your own values, priorities, and roles; as seeking wider opinion – Behaviour as permission to start with you and acknowledging you must be operating effectively to be the positive influence others need; be mindful of your own contribution and its impact upon that of others; seek the learning experiences from adversity and use the openness in seeking wider points of view; be future focused and therefore contribution lead; apply these same empathies to colleagues and be present to the changing energies they may expend or consume – Trust as a confidence in the return to control, more certainty, and clarity, and the mutual strength of relationships new and old in these harder times.

How To Stay Connected When Everything Is Working Against You, November 2020. Connectivity through adversity as v | b | t. Visibility as identifying better with shared purpose – Behaviour as making decisions that equate to giving more (cf. Journal of Neuroscience) and greater generosity in general; sharing experience in groups; be a connector and creating groups to combine ideas; be tenacious and direct it towards retaining and growing your network; be connected to yourself using social activities to combine the two – Trust as a built community to which you contribute, foster, and belong.

How To Tell If The Company Culture Is Right For You, November 2020. Cultural fit as v | b | t. Visibility as awareness of the culture and your own needs; greater perspective by knowing the vision and direction of travel of both; clarity of success towards these goals is measured; gaining information of culture from those promoted in its image; seeking perspective by comparison to wider market and customer base – Behaviour as an indicator of culture: decision speed showing adaptability or lack of control; decision making empowered and overseen and near the action, or hierarchically made at distance; managing uncertainty with more enquiry or adaptive action; reliance upon policy and process in siloes or supported by process in the hands of capable and high performing teams; conflict management transparency and focus upon process, task, or issue vs supporting hidden agenda, positions, people, or traits; ideas generation origins are they everywhere or reliant upon the few; training and wider learning, is it structured, consistent, and relevant vs ad hoc, reactive, ticking a corporate box; learning, is it everywhere and by everyone vs private, secret, offline; network, is social capital acknowledged, nurtured, and encourage vs divisive and self-serving; diversity vs clones; fair delegations, accountabilities, flexibilities vs favouritism and an elite – Trust as the faith in the culture or the excuse

Want To Love Your Work? These Are The 6 Colleagues You Must Have In Your Network, December 2020. People to network with as v | b | t. Visibility as feedback as seen through the eyes of the critic; feedback and perspective from the lifer colleague who has seen all sides of you; perspective from the distant colleague who will have a less bias and a more objective point of view – Behaviour as encouraged by the cheerleader; betterment by learning from your opposite i.e., the behaviours of your foil; own your psychological safety by finding the safe-haven confidante; – Trust as the more rounded you emerging from this more diverse multi-points of view.

Leading Change: 10 Ways Great Leaders Make Change Happen, January 2021. Leading change as v | b | t. Visibility as presenting a compelling picture of what the future can be; as clarity of expectations; as being seen – Behaviour as authenticity; as a set of witnessed behaviours others can model themselves upon; as proactivity in support, personal investment in the success of the change, and being present to the evolving and future need; being an educator, mentor, and builder of environments to progress and share success; being accountable, measurable, predictable, and firm – Trust as built from inclusivity and personal empowerment

What People Want: What Leaders Get Wrong And How To Be More Right, January 2021. Leadership errors as v | b | t. Visibility as an awareness of the different motives of leaders and those they lead; being vigilant to surprises; posing more questions to inform decisions; different opinions; whilst keeping the big picture in the minds of all – Behaviour as a more other focused perspective of leaders – addressing cognitive bias – by prioritising the needs of those they depend; notably safe space to support collaborations and enable focus; being more prepared to enact change where employees needs are no longer addressed by the status quo – Trust as built through engagement, being given a voice and being heard.

Want To Grow Your Career? 6 Surprising Ways To Write Your Future, January 2021. Revisiting the handwritten word as v | b | t. Visibility as a more memorable experience for the reader; written thought requires more precision and therefore clarity; handwritten notes can also reflect deeper personality traits – Behaviour as a more active orientated learning and taking advantage of haptics (touch and motion perception) which increasing brain areas involved and therefore retention; regular writing improves the ability to communicate; – Trust as a personal clarity of analytical thought.

The Future Of Work Will Demand These 8 New Skills, February 2021. Future work needs as v | b | t. Visibility as increased range of information gather, keeping current, and making sense of it all – Behaviour as training the brain to be more comfortable with ambiguity; expanding range of interests and pattern recognition; increased empathy to support increased entrepreneurial need; resilience and means to reinvent based upon the increased visibility actively sought; greater creativity, optimism, and imagination, from the increased information and regularity of review; increasing relationship building and rapport from increased focus on social capital; action orientated, join in, participate, and get things done – Trust as derived from a constant preparation and readiness; the countermeasure to echo chamber information sources by engaging in discourse to learn better the validity of opinion opposing your own.

Leadership Mistakes Can Derail Innovation: Here’s How To Avoid Them, February 2021. Leadership for innovation as v | b | t. Visibility as being vigilant to the barriers and blockers in resource stretch and time constraint that stifle innovative process – Behaviour as rewarding the actions desired as reinforcing culture; being present to the needs of boundaries to inspire not the endless latitude to let people become lost; creating space that enables group effort but still ensuring plenty of room for personal incubations and nurturing of ideas; being empowering of everybody to be creative; enabling the time necessary to build the idea; permitting embryonic and incremental approaches to be aired; giving space to be heard, and finding the difficult balance of criticality and encouragement; acknowledge place matters and work space or home space need to be places people want to be – Trust as fostering positive team relationships, creative environments, controls and conditions that enable innovative processes to grow.

Why You Need Wisdom And How To Be (More) Wise—According To Science, March 2021. Seeking wisdom as v | b | t. Visibility as broad perspective; and as longer-term view – Behaviour as altruism and cooperative interests, particularly in decision-making; self-management and emotional stability e.g., the authentic and calm faces on social media; diversity of network and associated tolerance and interest in values, and learnings, different from your own; finding ways to embrace uncertainty – Trust as earned through the breadth of perspective across a whole community, akin to but not necessarily age related senior or elders in a group.

Hard Times Make For Stronger Bonds And Greater Happiness: Here’s Why That Matters, April 2021. Bonds in adversity as v | b | t. Visibility as first hand experience of seeing someone in a crisis situation and the motivations of action when it counts; memorable and more vivid in recall; – Behaviour as empathy and solidarity with a chemically – oxytocin – or brain altered group association response (cf. Norwegian University of Science and Technology); reciprocal openness and vulnerability; post-trauma shared growth, shared prioritising, shared adversity and realisation post survival – Trust as “affinity proof” from a shared experience and a shared pain or positive end, a physiological bond of “social glue” (cf. University of New South Wales)

How To Build Relationships And Enhance Happiness: 4 Insights From Neuroscience, April 2021. Relationship building as v | b | t. Visibility as the direct relationship between seeing less people and increases in mental health issues; depth of relationships is associated with the breadth of their life we engage with; brain size is shown to be smaller in those with less meaningful relationships and that our brain capacity has influence on our close connection maximum being around 150 – Behaviour as necessarily time consuming to establish connections c.60 hours of regular engagement to cement friendships; generally one friend at a time beyond group settings; relationships (the 150) require a level of intimacy, shared experience including doing no activity at all but in each others company; connection beyond the context of first acquaintance such as dinner, drinks, walking; quality engagement and questions of substance in context; availing yourself in tough moments or being vulnerable enough to be helped; gratitude; respect; right fit for right friendship roles – Trust as a built relationship over time and a mutual investment towards mutually benefits with mutually respected boundaries and roles.

Gratitude Is A Key To Happiness: 4 Reasons Why, April 2021. Factoring in gratitude as v | b | t. Visibility as greater understanding of the neurological preconditioning gratitude involves – Behaviour as the being mode of gratitude vs the having mode of pursuing more; experiences positively convert to happiness more than materialism – this is based on gratitude; better relationships involve mutual expressions of gratitude; voicing gratitude magnifies its impacts – Trust as the aggregation of cultivated gratitude, as the resultant altruistic intentions it inspires into a wider community.

The Happiness Paradox: 5 New Perspectives On How To Be Happy, May 2021. Not coveting happiness as v | b | t. Visibility as not seeing what you do not have but instead a better perspective on what is or could be – Behaviour as a less direct aim to achieve happiness or retain it or hoard and inflate it (cf. Journal of Experimental Psychology); taking lessons for the downtimes; accepting the varied states of being that can become possessive and have us gripped; aim for choices that improve yourself, not aim to correct others; happiness can be borne of overcoming hardship, but rarely sits for long with too little stress; breaking with community or going too far alone can become an increasingly unhappy time – Trust as the fostering of shared experience, not the singular pursuit of more.

Why Now Is The Time To Question Everything—And Refresh Your Career And Your Future, June 2021. Career planning as v | b | t. Visibility as greater clarity on what is important and the right priority as change; question orientated planning; belief challenging searches; source challenging analytics – Behaviour as the continual questioning of everything (cf. Euripides); knowing that you do not know; adopting a curiosity in diversity, empathy, epistemology; decisions based upon direction of change; relationships built around widening perspectives and deeper understandings; seeking to be in awe more; humility not arrogance – Trust as in the strength of the questioning not conviction of the answers.

Build Your Career: 5 Ways To Have More Joy In Your Job, July 2021. Job satisfaction as v | b | t. Visibility as seeking more perspectives in the role; more clarity on priority and need – Behaviour as the positive product of better perspective, more meaningful endeavour, more enquiring interest, and more empathy; more variety; more empowerment and control; “better physical health, perform better, make better decisions, set bigger goals, seek greater learning and pursue growth and development more enthusiastically. In addition, you tend to be more likeable”; – Trust as a pursuit of contribution and an expectation of fair reward

The Power Of Purpose And Why It Matters Now, August 2021. The need for Purpose as v | b | t. Visibility as greater clarity of purpose, vision, commitment and moral to more engagement and productivity (cf. University of Sussex); increased clarity so individual contribution desire aligns to companies with same vision or presents a vision people are inspired to be part of; clarity and articulation of purpose, informing choice, acuity of perspective to retain adaptability and pre-empting change – Behaviour as more directed endeavour leading to better growth (cf. Harvard Business Review); necessarily clearer purpose required to retain transient workforce; – Trust as increased alignment of people to a shared goal.

You Probably Need More Friends—Here’s How To Make Them, September 2021. Friendships as v | b | t. Visibility as some shared perspective be that proximity, life stage, transition – Behaviour as a continuity and long-term stability of relationships in wider change; communication efficiency through prior understanding of each other; information exchange efficiency where friendships sit across weaker bonds (cf. UCL); adaptable as friendship groups change with time (cf. Netherlands Organisation for Scientific Research) Trust as a reciprocal pre-requisite for lasting friendships, needing time.

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In psychology we are required to look beneath the mask. This blog series is attempting to unmask some hidden parts of projects to engender a more collaborative way.

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